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Thursday, April 30, 2009

Work Romance ... Hot or not?

I was totally oblivious to the fact but this guy has a total 'crush' on me. (I say crush as if I'm a giggly school girl). I mean it's not 'fact' but its pretty obvious to me now. It's the bar work I'm doing and he's one of my fellow staff.

He's new and he's been super super dooper nice to me. I always make an effort to get along with everybody so I thought because I was being welcoming that he had just appreciated this and was just reciprocating. Wrong!

It was brought to my attention tonight and now I can see what everyone is seeing. Lol everyone was paying me out and was like 'oooo he's in love with you Andrew'. Really embarrassing. I mean he's a sweet guy and fun to work with but just not the kind of person I'm looking for. I would normally love to be asked out or have someone who is 'keen' on me but I just find him creepy. I think its because I find work romance disgusting. I hate to watch two colleagues blossoming! I think I'm just bitter.

Im totally flattered and boy do I love to feel wanted. Now that I know I seriously love the attention but really all I can think is 'eww' or 'no'. Gosh I'm such a nice person. I think I have committent issues. As soon as I know I can have someone I'm just repusled. I think its just fun to flirt but when it becomes something more real I just put up a barrier.

I'm sounding cocky, for all I know he could just be a nice guy who wants nothing more than friendship but the facts are there (I won't go into detail) but surely I should let things play out and just see what happens? Right.

What do you guys think? Am I leading him on? I don't want to discuss this with him incase my co-workers/conscious is wrong. Should I just let things stay as and see what happens? Should I step away and put up a barrier? Or has my brain created this whole situation and there is nothing more than a healthy working relationship?

Comments, questions and concerns appreciated from all!

Andrew

14 comments:

Gauss Jordan said...

Minimalist post? :-)

Andrew said...

haha i pushed post before i typed anything! the post is there now! have a look and let me know what u think :)

Randy said...

I wouldnt put up a barrier...

I would continue being nice, and maybe being flirty with em, to see what pans out...

But, if it starts to feel like your being a tease, i would cut it off...

naturgesetz said...

I agree with Randy that there is no need to put up a barrier. I'd say be pleasant. If he starts getting too close, you can ask him to back off a little. But this doesn't have to be all or nothing. Let it be at a level you can handle.

Micky said...

OK, so if I'm understanding this right, you're,er, 'in the market' in a general way, but you have a down on relationships at work. (Shame that's where we spend an awful lot of our waking hours.)

But if this guy does have the hots for you - or at least some say he does - oh, this is SILLY!

Ask the poor boy out for, er, a 'drink after work' sort of thing. You pick where and when and it's your show. You're in control.

Buy him his coffee / beer / glass of and then just ask him anodine stuff about the job and whatever he's told you about his home life.

I think that way you'd find out for certain. You'd see each other out of the work environment and you could still decide whether he was creepy or whether you wanted a quick f*** or a lon-lasting relationship.

Slave Simon said...

Take him home and shag him, hard.

(sorry i'm feeling a bit crude tonite - you'll have to get Micky to give me a gud spankin' )

Luv,

Tigs

Highwayman said...

I'd say to just continue to be the nice guy that you are and see what develops.

Baz said...

So what's the problem with a relationship at work?
As Micky said, we spend a lot of time there. About 1/3 of the day, 1/2 of our waking hours. Doesn't seem unreasonable to have some contact with others?
Don't put barriers up, let it work itself out, but you are in control - keep it that way.
I've had many relationships from work, some disasterous, (including my first and only marriage) some (with males) very enjoyable.
I'm not going more public than that!
If you want to talk about it, you have my MSN (tho' time zones make it hard to contact), and my e-mail. Feel free to contact me, I'll always respond.
Luv, Baz

torchy! said...

ditto naturgesetz. but as with all blog posts asking for advice, all we can go on is what you give us, body language etc is *so* important and is what we don't have.

you say you won't go into detail, do we need that detail to make sensible suggestions? idk. only you can decide that.

but whatever, i reckon you'd be a good 'catch' so it's no wonder he's interested! like me - i got ppl queuing up for me..... and then i woke up. lol.

torchy!

cvn70 said...

Andrew

Life sucks sometimes but i guess you have to make a choice and if your are ready to come out then maybe you do more than just flirting, otherwise use good judgment and have fun.

But it worries me that if you di dnot see this and evryone else did i have missed some one

take care and be safe

bob

Deadwing said...

just continue on as normal, be yourself. i wouldn't put up a barrier, but i wouldn't tease either. idk, i'm probly the worst person in the world to be offering this type of advice...lol. but, if you're not interested in him, you're not interested in him. good luck!

Miles said...

hey buddy...

I read your blog from start to finish this morning! It was helpful to read about someone very similar to me.

Anyways...I think i'll kepp reading :)

miles...

Andrew said...

Thanks for everyones comments. I won't individually reply. I'm gonna do a follow up post now hopefully :)The second opinions really helped!

Andrew

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