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Monday, July 26, 2010

'Just give in. Don't give up baby'

So its been around five or six months since I last posted. Shame on me. Why am I blogging? I had the urge. Does this mean I'm back in blogworld on a regular basis? Unlikely.

Well where to start? I don't want the first thing I write to be 'I have a boyfriend' because that sounds like thats all thats going on in my life. But thats essentially what this blog is about. Its about my love life. No one wants to hear about how I love my job or my favourite tv show. lol

So yes I have a boyfriend and things are going really well with him. In the beginning we had our ups and downs. Then I stopped thinking with my head and followed my heart and I'm so happy where its gotten me.

It all started several months ago.

Mark and I actually work together (different departments) and our workplace parties together quite regularly. I had a bet going with my friend that Mark was gay. She ended up asking him about it and he said he wasn't. I didnt buy it. So that night one by one everyone started leaving and finally we were left alone. Mark invited me to his place to have a few more drinks. Well to put a long story short. He had never felt an attraction to guys before he met me and he has only ever had straight relationships/sex. (I know what you're thinking I TURNED ONE). We fooled around a little that night and continued fooling around that week.

My head ended up going crazy... I didnt like that I was his first guy. I felt I had to make this an amazing experience, one that wouldnt turn him off men for the rest of his life. I don't know what I was thinking but my head was messing with my head so much that I could never cum when I was with him. So I ended things. We continued hooking up. Same deal. I ended things. He kept trying and trying and trying to make me believe that he actually wanted to be with me and in the end I said fuck it and gave Mark another chance and things are amazing. Its still puppy love and I never want it to wear off. I think what makes Mark different is he's just a regular guy, theres no bullshit, no games or drama (and the sex in amazing).

I have some something so simple that was shared with me by a friend and I want to share it to you:
'Keep yourself open to the idea that there is someone out there for you however the second you stop looking for love is the second it finds you.'